Wednesday, Dec. 2
By Katherine Schneider, for the CVPost
How was your Thanksgiving?
Mine was good—food, people, time to loaf and a truly grateful heart. But getting ready for this 2020 Thanksgiving took some planning. It made me consider other gatherings and how to make them successful these days.
As Priya Parker points out in her excellent book The Art of Gathering, 90% of what makes a gathering successful happens beforehand. Usually we focus on the who, what, when, where and how of the event, complete with observing all traditions possible.
But Parker points out that the beginning of the event and the end are also keys for turning it from good to great, if done right.
Whether you’re planning that next Zoom meeting, a book club discussion or a December holiday observance, consider the following:
- It’s okay to take charge of doing things differently. COVID has changed things. Sure, the book club meeting has always been about socializing and book discussion, but maybe nowadays the balance needs to move more toward socializing. Call on each person for a one sentence answer to an ice breaker question so everyone speaks before the discussion gets freewheeling.
- If you can’t do the gathering the old way, how can you honor the purpose of it? A family did a Zoom birthday party for a member turning 80. Instead of the cake and coffee at church, a family member organized each person contributing to an alphabet poem about the birthday person. Then the writer in the family put it together and read it at the Zoom celebration.
- So. . . to apply that approach to a specific example: Ask each person to bring a favorite holiday memory to share at a Zoom holiday party. (If your guests are not the talking kind, watch a holiday movie together.)
- When it comes to ending gatherings – whether electronic or socially distanced in-person – issue a “last call” a few minutes ahead of the ending time instead of waiting for people to fall asleep or drop off the Zoom call. Confirm the next meeting, assign “homework” (if any) and end with a strong exit line.
Reflecting on what went right at Thanksgiving and what could have been better is a great starting point for planning the next set of holiday gatherings. And you don’t even have to worry about some of us perverted folks trying to foist fruitcake off on you this year.